I work two jobs, but when people ask me what I’m up to these days I say I’m unemployed. I like my jobs and they pay pretty well, but even combined they barely qualify for the definition of ‘part-time.’ Since I’ll be moving in the next 2-3 months, there doesn’t seem to be much point in finding a job here right now.
I guess this means I’m in that post-degree, artsy, destitute, soul-searching stage.I can work with that.
I’ve been watching a lot of daytime TV recently since I’ve been out of school. It’s worse than I remembered. When did Ellen become my favourite time of day? Maybe it’s time I took a bit of a break.
I just finished eating a whole can of chicken noodle soup out of the pot. For the second time in two months I am disgustingly ill. I would be pointing fingers at H1N1, except I don’t think I believe in it. H1N1 that is, not pointing fingers. And besides, my mom once told me that you can tell if you have a virus because your boogers will be green. Mine are not. P.S. Why does ‘Mucous Relief’ NeoCitran taste so much worse than regular NeoCitran? Why can’t my mucous be relieved as deliciously as my other symptoms?!
I’m drinking water out of a Sleeman’s beer glass because the only real glasses I have are these short little tumblers, maybe 3 or 4 inches tall. When I get a thirst on, 3 inches of water just isn’t going to cut it. I don’t know why I don’t have any tall glasses. I’ve been living on my own for 5 years and I have a toaster oven, waffle iron and a matching cutlery set, but I drink water out of free promotional beer glasses. It bothers me every time I pour myself a glass of water, but for whatever reason I can’t bring myself to take a trip to the dollar store and pick up some real drinking glasses.
I bought Wii Fit a couple of weeks ago but I won’t use it now because I know I’ve gained weight and I’m afraid that the little sprite will judge me. Instead, I’ve been playing pokemon, because I’m ten years old. There’s a special promotion going on at gamespot stores soon. If I go in with my game they will give me a free rare pokemon. Someone please talk me out of this.
This winter has been insane. My Aunt told me it’s the most snow Edmonton has seen since 1971. Don’t believe me? Here’s the view of their backyard:
See that circle in the middle? That's a picnic table.
This week has been warm, though, above zero for the first time in months. So it’s all melting. Ever wondered where four feet of snow goes when it melts? Answer: EVERYWHERE.
Upon deciding that I needed to get out of the house in which I have been hiding from the snow for several week now, I took it upon myself to go for a short walk to the bookstore. I had just finished The Girl Who Played With Fire, the second novel in Stieg Larsson’s trilogy, and desperately needed to pick up the third. (As an aside, what an annoyingly successful cliffhanger ending.)
Although I live in a city where it is winter 8 months out of the year, I have somehow managed to accumulate zero shoes that are waterproof. I was walking in my own personal twin swamps by the time I made it to Chapters. Not only were my socks wet, The Girl Who Kicked The Hornets’ Nest is apparently only available in hardcover edition.
Riddle me this, please:
Who in the anal-retentive every-detail-counts world of book publishing decided that two of the three books in a trilogy should be available in paperback while the third only exists as a hardcover? What happens if you’re a paperback girl? What happens if you like uniformity? Do they just expect me to throw them on my bookshelf like that, with matching cover art and everything, while one is twice the size of the other two?!
And it’s not just the Larsson books. I dealt with the same issue when I went out to buy the Twilight series. (I’m not even going to apologize. I read Twilight. Deal with it.) For some bizarre reason, the first one was only available in paperback, while the other three were exclusively hardcover editions. This is beyond my comprehension. Do the editors not have bookshelves? Do they not look at the three books altogether and realize that they DO NOT MATCH?
Am I the only person who feels like this is some kind of terrorist revenge plot against consumer freedom??
WHO AT PENGUIN BOOKS HATES ME THIS MUCH??